Everyone seems to run these days; towards, away from. I do it too, in deference, like a lemming. But I know that if I catch myself and slow to a stroll, I’ll feel better. Detached. The rhythm of that stroll always gets me thinking, of music, books, film. Never clutter, always the good stuff. Touchstones that keep me from that modern malaise: indifference. Sure things, that I know will involve me, reconnect me, and make me believe that you feel like I do.For some reason I’m always attracted to, and compelled by melancholy. My favourite songs are invariably soaked in sadness. Not mawkish misery or self pity, just that gentle glow of regret or resignation. I’d always reach for “God Only Knows” rather than “Good Vibrations”, the last thing Brian Wilson makes me think about is sunshine!We all wish to be elsewhere, but live where compromise leaves us. Although we can be transported by music and literature, they can also help to heal us in situ, as a balm against the irritations of modern life and the labour of longing. But for me, there always has to be that shiver of sadness.Give me the promise of something pure, conceived for the right reasons. Not born from commercial concerns, but created by folk who simply can’t help themselves. Sometimes artistic integrity can force those folk up creative cul de sacs. I guess that most true art is doomed to be regarded as ‘uncommercial’ and therefore deemed to have limited appeal. So you have to get out there and search for the good stuff. I have piles of Cds that promised the perfect song, the wisest insight. Books that would see me “moved to tears”, but left me dry as a bone. Yet the thrill of the possibilities, and that moment when, out of nowhere, you get ‘the shiver’,  makes all of those disappointments worthwhile, and in fact justifies them.Someone once wrote that “there is no life, just different methods of departure.” That’s the beauty of the human condition; the very fact that we are doomed to disappointment, disintegration and, ultimately death, is what makes life so irresistible and keeps us reaching for the stars.So, here’s a list of things that help to heal me. They don’t necessarily brighten my day, but they enrich me, slow me to a stroll; keep me connected yet detached, grounded yet elevated, and happy in my sadness.

MUSIC

The Blue Nile ‘Tinseltown’ ‘Downtown Lights’ ‘Family Life’...  for the warmth of Buchanan’s voice against the icy musical backdrops. He speaks simply, and I believe every word he says.Tom Waits ‘Kentucky Avenue’ ‘Tom Traubert’s Blues’ etc... for the romance of the early stuff, and the audacity of his recent cacophonies. “The obsessions’s in the chasing, and not the apprehending.”Joni Mitchell ‘Case of You’ ‘Amelia’ ...for her integrity and tunings.Prefab Sprout ‘Desire As’ ‘Appetite’ for...Paddy’s lyrical twists, and melodic genius.‘Wichita Lineman’ Glen Campbell. Perfect song and performance. “...and I need you more than want you, and I want you for all time...”

BOOKS

Raymond Carver. Everything...for his heartbreaking directness. No tricks. The small dramas that make or break us, observed and set down with a focus and detachment that is absolutely involving. “Life. Always life.”Richard Ford ‘The Sportswriter’ ‘Independence Day’ A kindred spirit of Carver. Crystalline observation of ‘ordinary’ lives.Paul Auster ‘Moon Palace’ ‘Book of Illusions’...for investing his extraordinary characters  with everyday weakness.Anne Micheals ‘Fugitive Pieces’ Both uplifting and demoralising. It addresses love, loss and heartache with a poets eye.

FILM

‘Once Upon a Time in America’ ... for the credibility of DeNiro’s love of his childhood friends  amidst the hope and hopelessness and for the inevitability of its tragedies, (see ‘Kentucky Avenue’) and finally, for its perfectly placed score by Ennio Morricone.‘Cinema Paradiso’ ...for (again), its characters love of each other. Cynics call it mawkish, but only a heart of stone could resist the montage of kisses that ends the film. Morricone again.